There is a social event I attend somewhat regularly. A Muslim man also attends and always searches me out for conversations.
I have a hard time shaking him off – though I desperately try. He has only two
topics of interest: Shia and Islamophobia.
Of the two, Shia is his favorite topic. He wants to tell me
how bad the Shia are. I do not happen to be Shia. He will tell me stories and constantly pull
up ‘YouTube’ videos on his phone to show me how bad they are. Usually, I try to change the subject.
Recently, I guess I was just tired, I decided to ask him
some questions.
I asked, Why do you hate Shia so much?”
He replied, “I do not hate anyone. Islam teaches us not to
hate. I just really don’t like Shia a lot.”
I replied, “Your obsession demonstrates otherwise.”
He replied, “I am not obsessed.”
I asked, “How many times a day do you look at, or search
for, videos about Shia? You understand those videos are not posted by Shia but
by people who want to show Shia are bad? If you just didn’t like them, you
would ignore them – not look for more and more reasons to justify why you
should dislike them. And you would not want to always talk to everyone about
how bad they are. This is the very definition of hate.”
He again said, “I don’t hate them but they are evil and bad.
They are not even Muslim. And if you knew what they did to my country you would
understand.”
I said, “Are all Shia bad?”
He said, “Yes.”
I asked, “Have you met all the Shia?”
I replied, “80% of Shia are bad, like the videos.”
I asked, “Have you met 80% of the Shia?
He said, “No, but I met enough to know.”
I told him, “You can call it “apples” if you want, but that
is still hate.”
Then I asked him, “How is what you are doing different than
the people who hate Muslims? They also continuously look for evidence that
Muslims are bad by finding writings and videos that show something negative
about Muslims, even if it is not true, so they can paint a broad negative picture
about all Muslims and justify their hate.”
He replied, “No, it’s different. Not all Sunni Muslims are
bad but almost all Shia are.”
Unbelievable!
This man is the epidemy of both hypocrisy and double
standards.
Hypocrite: a person
who claims or pretends to have certain beliefs about what is right but who behaves
in a way that disagrees with those beliefs.
Double Standard: any
code or set of principles containing different provisions for one group of
people than for another.
But he is not the only one.
I meet with Shia who tell me how bad Sunni are; Sunni and
Shia who tell me how bad Sufi are.
I meet with people who are not Muslim who [I guess believing
I am that ever elusive “exception”] want to tell me how bad Muslims are, with
no sect distinction.
I hear people talk bad about homosexuals. [Funny how I never
hear anyone talking about heterosexuals having sex outside of marriage anymore.
Not that I miss it, but, double standard anyone?]
I hear Protestants talk bad about Catholics; I hear Methodist
talk bad about Baptist; I hear atheists talk bad about people of faith – and
visa-a-versa.
I hear one color or ethnicity talk bad about another.
And let’s not even mention political party affiliations –
the level of hate there makes an observer feel like they need a shower.
I truly do not understand it.
I do not understand how any “community” that feels they are
“under attach” [and it seems like every “community” feels they are under attack
now], can justify broad and hateful attacks on other communities.
Not every person in any group hates an entire other
group. Even saying it is true of the
“majority” of a group is simply false - unless the group itself is extremely small, close-nit, brainwashed, and heavily controlled by only one leader who spoon-feeds them their opinions. Very rare.
So many people are painting broad brushes about entire
sections of our society – not just a specific behavior but as though the entire
“community” is evil.
And people feel totally justified in doing it, whether based
on religion or not.
I grew up as a Christian and one of my favorite sayings was
“Hate the sin, love the sinner.” Not bad advice.
I am not saying we have to all love each other, but getting
to know each other (and getting rid of the “exception” designations) would go
a long way in understanding how everyone with an “affiliation” is not a carbon
copy. Everyone cannot be an “exception” or it becomes the “rule.” [How many
“exceptions” does it take to make a “rule” anyway?]
Muslims are taught that God intentionally made humans
diverse not to divide us but so we could get to know one another. Even with such a beautiful
message, even Muslims, as this angry man clearly demonstrates, are missing the
point. [Personally I believe he has so much self-loathing, or feels guilty over his own lack of piety somehow, that he needs to find
someone else he believes is worse than him in order to feel better about
himself.]
If your feelings have acquired hate status toward another
broad group, you have relinquished
your right to complain that others are unjustifiably expressing hate toward the
group with which you affiliate.
If you are obsessed with the passionate dislike of an entire
identifiable group of people based on an affiliation they have (born or
chosen), your feelings have acquired hate status.
You can call it “apples,” but it is still hate.
Have you ever encountered someone obsessed with generalizing an entire group negatively?
Have you ever been the "exception?"
You can call it “apples,” but it is still hate.
Have you ever encountered someone obsessed with generalizing an entire group negatively?
Have you ever been the "exception?"
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